All Hail, Her Majesty

If all writers are nuts, I'm the Queen of InsaneIstan.

About five minutes after I sent it out, I hate every story I write. Even if some kind editor actually wants to pay me money for my words.

Case in point: The editor for Modern Magic anthology just sent me comments for my short story. My first reaction was to cringe and think, "I wrote that two years ago. I don't even want to look at it." The correct reaction should have been, "Cool. Now I can get PAID."

Until a couple of years ago, I couldn't stand the idea of anyone reading my fiction. So I didn't write any. Ever. Nowadays, I claim that neurosis has been beaten into submission.

Actually, it's just taken a new form. I send things out and perversely hope they'll just go away. "Go ahead. Read it. Just don't tell me you read it."

On the upside, I take rejection well. "Yeah. You're right. It's horrible." OTOH, the attitude isn't conducive to sales. Recently, one market rejected a story, but suggested changes and asked to see it if I made the changes. Have I made the changes? Nooo. My excuse. I'm waiting till that market reopens for submissions. Or perhaps I'm waiting for Christmas or pigs to fly or...

Right. Meanwhile, I could be submitting a new improved version to other markets. But no, I have to be Ms. NeuroticPants.

So the goal for today is to make changes to the [sold] story and get it back to the MM editor. And revise the "near miss story." And send a third story out to submission land.

And hope it goes away.