Ramblings from the Desert

The man who trades freedom for security does not deserve nor will he ever receive either. ~Benjamin Franklin

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Location: New Mexico

Author of the urban fantasy novel, The Music of Chaos, and the paranormal romance, The Canvas Thief.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Stuff I've Learned

*The burgers at fast food restaurants never look like the commercials.

*The more personalization on a vehicle--stupid parental pride ("My child is a superstar at..."), vapid jingoism ("America is Number One"), undercarriage lights, Godly irritations (Jesus Saves), magnetic ribbons, etc.--the worse the driver.

*When caught singing along with the car radio...keep on singing.

*Dress like every day is laundry day.

*Matching socks are overrated.

*Clean underwear, however, isn't.

*Eat the doughnut.

*Exercise "seems" to lengthen your life. This is because time always slows down while you are being tortured.

*A pair of shoes costs $100 and is marked 30-percent off. You will save $70 by NOT buying the shoes.

*Foreplay and romance are overrated. After a long, hard day, there is nothing better than a quick, frenetic fuck followed by rolling over and going to sleep.

*If someone says you have PMS and you fly into an indignant, blind rage...you have PMS.

*All women are insane. Every. Last. One. What? Did I just violate some crucial tenent of sista-hood--admitting lunacy? Tough. IN-SANE.

*"All the biggest nuts rise to the top" applies to management as well as snack foods.

*I remain an agnostic. Should The Almighty wish to send me a sign, however, He may zap Pat Robertson with a lightning bolt.

In The News...
Disney Gone Wild
Donald Duck is a raging pervert.. I never can understand what the foul fowl is saying, but it must be something like "Hey, little girl, wants some candy?" via comment by Doug Hoffman

Meanwhile, Mickey set a house on fire. Revenge of the flaming mouse.

Cheers,
P.K.

 

Graphics and Content Copyright © Patricia Kirby 2005