Ramblings from the Desert

The man who trades freedom for security does not deserve nor will he ever receive either. ~Benjamin Franklin

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Location: New Mexico

Author of the urban fantasy novel, The Music of Chaos, and the paranormal romance, The Canvas Thief.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

No More Kiddie Porn

Because I'm not in the mood for politics or much else, I wandered over to Ms. Giggles to see if she had read anything good lately. I like her reviews. Unlike some readers, she doesn't equate bird-brained heroines with cute and spunky. Bird-brained is just bird-brained. Although, frankly, she is more generous with some novels than I'd be, giving some excretable books ratings as high as 60 (I'd rate them much lower). I like her snarky style.

I've come to the conclusion that a lot of contemporary, "light" romance* is glorified kiddie porn. Why? Because the heroine acts like twelve-year-old girl. In fact, when the hero decides he loves her (after knowing her a day or so, ugh), his attraction is driven by her cute and [read] childlike nature.

(*This includes "fluffy" paranormals in a contemporary setting.)

This sort of heroine twitters and engages the hero in witty banter that is anything but. A favorite device in the books I've read (or not-read, since I couldn't finish them) is the "you have a silly name," or "you have a silly accent" driven dialogue. Heroine makes fun of the hero and he frowns stoically and secretly finds her adorable. Mind you, I love snark. But good verbal sparring needs to be grounded in intelligence. If the best an author can come up with is an endless play on words around the hero's name, author shouldn't bother writing "funny."

And the heroine never fucking shuts up. Again, I guess the persistent babble is supposed to be cute or vivacious, or whatever. The result is a character who seems afraid to shut the hell up. "If I stop talking, my brain might start working."

Lord knows I like fun, but what is with the vacuous heroines that populate so many light/funny romances? I suppose the lame humour reflects what most women think is funny*. Jennifer Cruise, on her website, says that women don't like humor that denigrates others. Honey, all humor is hurtful. The good stuff, anyway. Whether it's the old slipping-on-a-banana peel thing or self-deprecating humor, funny equates with someone's misfortune. If you take away the "ouch," all that's left is the milquetoast crap of straight-to-video kids' movies.

*Of course, chick lit is plenty snarky. Probably why a few chick lit books have actually earned my "keeper" designation, while, to date, no light romance novels have that honor.

If I wanted to read about a grown man banging a little girl, I'd....ARGH, NO, I don't want to see that. That's the point.

Searching through Ms. Giggles's reviews for funny romance between Grown Ups. Wish me luck.

Writing...
Got a really good--or so I think--idea for revising recently rejected story. Still making good progress on book two.

Asta luego,
Pat K.

 

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