Ramblings from the Desert

The man who trades freedom for security does not deserve nor will he ever receive either. ~Benjamin Franklin

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Location: New Mexico

Author of the urban fantasy novel, The Music of Chaos, and the paranormal romance, The Canvas Thief.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Let's Make Lots of Money

INT-LIVING ROOM, CHEZ KIRBY

Plopped in front of television for daily dose of indoctrination from local news. Because they are fresh out of domestic-abuse-cases-turned-SWAT-situations, the newscasters are showing a clip about the local woman who knitted the blanky that covered up dimwitted, always bug-eyed runaway bride. Woman laughs and says she wouldn't be surprised if the next time she sees the blanket is on eBay.

J-MAN
That's what we need. Something like that to sell on eBay.

ME
Yeah. We need to find Jesus on a taco shell.

J-MAN
I dunno. It's been done before. The last Jesus item on sale at eBay only went for about 10K.

ME
Only? Hey, we could make a little Jesus branding iron and stamp the Savior's face on a few dozen grilled cheese sandwiches. At 10K a pop, we'd make a killing. We'll have the house in New Zealand in no time.

J-MAN
I dunno. I think we need something with a story. Like the guy who sold his ex-wife's wedding dress.

ME
Here's an idea. How about I shove a stick up my ass so that my eyes bug out like a Chihuahua dog? Then I run away, claim fundie wingnut midgets kidnapped me, and then admit it was all a hoax brought on by the stress of training the Nikster. You forgive me because I have i-shoos, and we sell the movie rights to Judith Regan. I bet I can get some sweet deals on my novels too.

J-MAN
I'll go get a stick.


 

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